Leadership: Tough Minded & Tender Hearted

A few weeks ago I asked you all for recommendations for summer reading. Sue Winning went one step further and loaned me a great book - "TouchPoints: Creating Powerful Leadership Connections in the Smallest of Moments" by Douglas Conant.

I couldn’t wait to share some of the things that I took away from this book with all of you.

The book talks about many tools and strategies you can utilize to be both "tough minded and tender hearted." Simply put, we will still get the results we strive and work for, but we still care about the people around us and on the path along the way. 

One section talked about identifying one thing you would change in yourself as a leader or that you would change in your boss.

This sure made me think about what I would change in my leadership style! When I actually said it out loud I knew it was unrealistic, but I would want my boss to have the same priorities that I have for his time. Even though the parts of his job that impact me are probably less than 25%, it is totally unrealistic that he would concentrate at the same level of intensity or priority that I do about the same issues.

Getting some perspective on that was tremendously helpful for me and made me a lot more appreciative of what it takes to stand in his shoes.

Thank you, Sue, for lending me this book. It has helped me to become a better leader, as well as to be led.

So just think about that for a minute – are there things that you wish your boss would do differently for you? Would you be so bold to share them? 

In doing so, you may provide valuable insight to yourself as well as your boss! 

Summer reading, had me a blast

Summer reading reminds of Miss Hawk’s third grade class, when she told us we had to read over the summer or we would fall behind in fourth grade.

I got a “U” for unsatisfactory in cursive handwriting in third grade. So, I was already traumatized, and the reading list did me in. I don’t remember what we read but I know I finished it the first week we were on vacation.

There is something relaxing about reading a book, especially when you’re relaxing on the beach. So, over four decades later I still select books to read over the summer so I don’t fall behind.

I know, you won’t be shocked – since I am your resident nerd – but some of the books I have read (and are sharing with you today) are work related.

The three books that are in my nerd category are:

1. The Oz Principle
2. Talk Like Ted
3. Do the KIND Thing

The Oz Principle was given to me by a former Children’s Specialized Hospital employee who thought I would enjoy it. It is all about challenging your beliefs about individual and organizational accountability.

Talk Like Ted is about the secrets of public speaking. Although I do a lot of public speaking, the State Chamber Chair will require me to speak to groups outside of health care. So, this book will definitely help me step up my game.

Do the KIND Thing is written by the Founder and CEO of KIND, the company that makes those incredible granola bars. The thing that caught me about this book is not only that I love those little bars but the cover had the following words in a circle “Think Boundlessly, Work Purposefully, and Live Passionately.”

That was it! I was in. See after turning the age of 50, I have started to wonder: I know I work hard and am always busy, but am I truly paying attention to all aspects of my life? I don’t think it is possible to run full throttle in all areas at the same time, but I don’t want to wake up at the age of 60 and say, “Where the heck did the last decade go????”

I’m a pretty frequent customer of Amazon, so I went to the site to check out their summer reading list to add a little FUN to my summer reading.

My first Kindle purchase this season was The Vacationers. It’s a story of a family vacation to celebrate the parents’ 35^th wedding anniversary. It seems interesting but the cover caught my eye, so I’ll let you know when I’m done how it was.

My second purchase was Beautiful Ruins because it is set in Italy and that is where I celebrated my BIG birthday last year. 

On my radar for later in the summer is Sue Grafton’s new book X. It comes out on August 25 and I am impatiently waiting for the launch!

Since the summer months are in full swing, I’m going to need some recommendations. So, what are you reading this summer, and why?

Also, if anyone wants to borrow the Janet Evanovich hard cover books with Stephanie Plum – I think I have almost all of them!!! I am always in for a good book swap! 

What I Know Now... Life Lessons

Have you ever read of those "Oh my god books?" The one that you think the author was actually looking in your head and stole your thoughts? My latest is, "What I know now" edited by Ellyn Spragins. This short read is a compilation of letters written by very successful women to themselves. They are writing at the point in time when they were most in need of advice. So the women, give that advice, in the form of a letter “to their younger self.”

This year, I will be 43. I remember that there was a time in my life - probably the age of many of you - that I thought 43 was SO OLD! Here is what I know now - the things I thought would literally prevent me from living the life I had all planned out - the toughest things - not having children, getting divorced, losing a job.

Here's what I know now - you live through all of it. Just like the kids who end up in our care - the worst things happen, the unthinkable and whether you want it or not - the sun is going to come up tomorrow. Always. And you will be left to have the courage to figure out whatever situation you are presented with. I wonder whether at 30, would the book have talked to me in the same way - I am not sure - some things only come with age. But if the book can talk to you and help you see what a tremendously wonderful person you are and how much you have to offer, whatever is going on in your personal and work life, then it is all good.

I highly recommend this book - it shows you great insight into some of the most amazing people of our time (Cokie Roberts, Queen Noor, Beverly Sills, Pikaboo Street and more) and shows you at their darkest moment - the thing they needed to remember was that they had more than they knew, and that they needed to listen to their inner voice.

I would love to know what you think of the book.

Have you ever had a “What I Know Now” moment you’d like to share?
Maybe a family move that changed everything for you?
Or maybe a life style change that catapulted you in a new direction?